Tantus Alan



Three realistic skintones to choose from






1.54″ diameter


Dual density, realistic texture, removable vibrator, hypoallergenic, dishwasher safe

Tantus Alan Reviewed by on .

Review Overview

Intensity 7.4
Quietness 10
Uniqueness 7.5
Orgasmibility 10

If the Tantus Uncut Dildos I call Rafael and Rashad and the Tantus Duchess had a baby, it would be Alan. It would also be super-weird, since I’m involved in ongoing affairs with all four of them.

Alan inherited R and R’s realistic form. He looks and feels like a real cock, complete with subtle veins and ridges. He’s about the same length as Rafael, making him 1.25″ shorter than Rashad. From top to bottom he’s as girthy as Raf at his widest, but since his shaft never tapers, he feels a good deal larger. He’s the same height as and less wide than the Duchess.

From his mom’s side (yes, I’m continuing this creepy analogy) Alan got his O2 Dual Density properties. Like The Duchess, he features a super-soft outer layer over a firm core. Also like The Duchess, he comes with a waterproof vibrating bullet and removable suction cup base, enabling harness compatibility and the opportunity to ride him against the nearest wall. He’s the first vibrating realistic toy in the new O2 Dual Density line.

Of course when I brought Alan home, The Duchess welcomed him with open arms. Not unlike a mother. Okay, I’m ending this analogy. Hellos with Rafael and Rashad were a bit more awkward. It’s no secret my Uncut Dildos are two of my favorites, and they weren’t eager to accept a fella who shares most of their charms, but with bonuses. I reminded R and R that Alan’s circumcision makes him oh so average and that he can’t boast their g-spot curve, but it was a hard sell as Alan stood proudly atop his suction cup base and Rafael slumped against my lamp.

all three tantus

After we all shook hands, I took some time to squeeze on each of my Tantus dildos. Alan and The Duchess are equally dense and flexible, but I was surprised that the difference between my O2 toys and my Uncut Dildos wasn’t more pronounced. They’re definitely firmer, but without a plug or bullet inserted, all will bend as much as you want them to and none are pushovers.

When Alan and I finally found ourselves alone, I realized I’d misplaced his single speed bullet. No worries–The Duchess comes with the same one, so I removed hers (with my teeth… I should really use lube when I put those things in) and inserted it into Alan. Presumably because he is a bit thinner, I could feel the vibrations more thoroughly throughout Alan than I could through The Duchess.

Alan felt good. Really good. But all Tantus toys feel really good. Comparing the way one Tantus toy makes you feel to another is like comparing your reactions to two Picassos. It’s personal preference and there is no right or wrong. But since this is what I get paid for (or not really, actually, but whatever) I’ll tell you what I liked about Alan.

He’s a good size for me. The Duchess is nice when I’m in the mood for girth and Rafael is a sweet companion who hits the spot. Rashad is Alan’s biggest rival. He’s got the curve that I love and that uncircumcised head is sexy as hell. Between them I can’t pick a favorite, but I’m not really going to try. They’re different dudes for different moods.

I enjoyed the vibration, and his slight base made manipulating him a breeze, but it wasn’t long before we headed to the shower. I popped out the bullet and slid in the plug (which is both easy to insert and remove) and pushed him against my shower wall. He didn’t stick.

It would be unfair to not mention here that at this point I’d also included my Tantus Perfect Plug. He left me with lube on my hands, for which I blamed Alan’s reluctance to stick. He also left me eager to get things started, so I threw in the towel earlier than I might have and plopped Alan down instead on the ledge of the tub.

Which was actually the perfect place to plop him. He adhered like a champ and allowed me to assume total control, something Rafael and Rashad have never done. No matter how I moved, how far I leaned in one direction or another, he stayed firmly planted. He may lack that g-spot curve, but his flexible shaft combined with how adaptable he is to a variety of positions actual does enable g-spot stimulation. It was… intense.

Afterwards, I tried again to attach him to my shower wall, and again suffered difficulties. It seems the Tantus base doesn’t do well when it encounters seams between tiles. I was surprised, since there’s not much space between mine, so I performed a Suction Cup Challenge.

suction cup challenge

As it turns out, Colours and the my Vibro Realistic also don’t fare well against seams. I guess I’ve never noticed because I’m not usually facing them when I plant them against the shower wall. Of the three, the Vibro Realistic was the hardest to adhere, but ended up with what might have been the strongest stick. Their performance, while impressive, was disappointingly comparable. I’ll start working on a more cutthroat challenge.

Other than that, I have but one complaint about Alan, and that’s his name. He’s not an Alan at all! He’s like your average dude who is actually surprisingly strong and sexy. Reliable and eager to please but undeniably masculine. Wait, that’s totally an Alan, isn’t it? Damn it, Tantus. You’ve done it again.

About The Author

Alison Barber is an tattooed toy junkie, sex blogger, and owner of Taboo, RVA's premier adult retail destination.

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